Only now does it occur to me... that not only does SEA OF LOVE offer the trappings of a kinda-mediocre-but-fun sex thriller in the FATAL ATTRACTION/BASIC INSTINCT/SLIVER/BODY OF EVIDENCE vein, not only does it feature Al Pacino and John Goodman as hot-doggin' detectives,
who prefer to work outside the system––much to chagrin of their straight-laced boss, John Spencer (of course),
not only does it feature an extremely young and quippy Samuel L. Jackson,
Credited in the role of––no joke, unfortunately––"Black Guy"
not only does it contain an absurd GODFATHER reference alluding to the restaurant cop-killing of Sterling Hayden,
Pacino: "What is she gonna do, confess? Shoot me? We're in a restaurant!!"
not only do Pacino and Ellen Barkin offer the most hilarious, post-9 1/2 WEEKS, food-related seduction scene this side of TROLL 2:
He was lookin' for Chips Ahoy
She was lookin' for fresh produce, but then she found...
No, not love––she found...
Yellow bell peppers
Oh yes she did
No, we shouldn't, look at all this fresh romaine
Just waiting to go on a salad, perhaps a Caesar
not only does SEA OF LOVE offer all of these sublime and occasionally laughable joys, but it also, and perhaps most importantly, it depicts the best shower curtain of all time––
this beautifully whimsical portrait of rumba musicians who happen to be alligators. Said shower curtain belongs to hardboiled cop Pacino,
whose street cred has never been more crystal clear.