Only now does it occur to me... that HIRED TO KILL is the only movie where female commandos
are trained to impersonate runway models
by Brian Thompson (usually a typecast heavy––COBRA, BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER, LIONHEART, THE X-FILES ––playing a Schwarzenegger-lite hero here)
Sorta feels like TRUE LIES, if it were directed by Andy Sidaris
on the orders of Oscar-winner and literally phoned-in performer George Kennedy (COOL HAND LUKE, FLIGHT OF THE PHOENIX)
to rescue political prisoner and fellow Oscar-winner José Ferrer (LAWRENCE OF ARABIA, MOULIN ROUGE)
from petty dictator Oliver Reed (GLADIATOR, THE DEVILS, THE BROOD, WOMEN IN LOVE)
Essentially doing Wilford Brimley cosplay?
who is, indeed, drunk and generally checked out enough so as to be indistinguishable from a cardboard cutout, a comparison which viewers can actually put to the test.
Cardboard cutout Oliver Reed...
versus the real McCoy.
On the whole, this mess––filmed in Greece, and set in the fictitious Mediterranean/South American country "Cypra"–– generally goes out of its way to make COMMANDO look like THE SEVENTH SEAL.
