Sunday, May 10, 2015

Coming soon: Good things come in 3's!

Spring is here, which for me means cold beers and hot pizzas and bad movies.  I have a new themed cycle of reviews in the works, devoted entirely to the third films of a series.  Most of these are relatively obscure and belong to franchises that, using conventional wisdom, probably shouldn't have had a second installment, much less a third.  Sometimes they aren't even the third installment, they just claim to be.  And we are the richer for them.  I'm not opposed to recommendations, either, so fire away!
From the poster art of Cannon's NINJA III: THE DOMINATION.

4 comments:

Mike Bradley said...

I have a feeling that this will be schweet indeed! And, it may be a longshot, but "Phantasm III" is a far cooler "getting the band back together" project than it has any right to be.

J.D. Lafrance said...

NINJA III! Yeah... Ah, some Lucinda Dickey awfulness...

Cannon said...

I've compiled a list for your, and while I don't expect most of them to make the grade, I must insist...

Braddock: Missing in Action III

...as an absolute given. It's Cannon, it's 80s, it's Chuck Norris. And in honor of the numerical criteria, it features a triple death-blow scene.

The rest are listed in no particular order. Oh, and I hope you like colons.

The Bad News Bears go to Japan
Darkman III: Die Darkman Die
Maniac Cop III: Badge of Silence
RoboCop 3
The NeverEnding Story III: Escape from Fantasia
(featuring terrible puppet shit and Jack Black as the leader of The Nasties)
Xtro3: Watch the Skies
The Expendables 3
Houseparty 3
A Rage in Harlem
(directed by Bill Duke. Yes, that Bill Duke.)
From Dusk Till Dawn 3: The Hangman's Daughter
Beverly Hill Cop III
(if for no other reason than the 'George Lucas wearing a cartoon piggy sweatshirt' cameo)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III
Carnosaur 3: Primal Species
Poltergeist III
D3: The Mighty Ducks
Apocalypse III: Tribulation
(Gary Busey...in a Christian moive!)
Superman III
No Retreat, No Surrender 3: Blood Brothers
American Ninja 3: Blood Hunt
Kenny Rogers as The Gambler, Part III: The Legend Continues
Look Who's Talking Now
(The answer is: dogs. Fucking dogs are talking in this one.)
Batman Forever
The Omen III: The Final Conflict
Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell
The Substitute III: Winner Takes All
The Karate Kid Part III
(AKA I Love it when He Pounds Him!)
Psycho III
The Class of Nuke 'Em High 3: The Good, the Bad and the Subhumanoid
Crocodile Dundee in Los Angeles
Deadline Auto Theft
Bloodsport III
Child's Play 3
Scanners III: The Takeover
Honey, We Shrunk Ourselves
(really, though, I Blew Up the Kid deserves its own special review)
Resident Evil: Extinction
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors
Cannon Movie Tales: Hansel and Gretel
Highlander III: The Final Dimension
Leprechaun 3
Howling III
(that's right, the Australian one)
Trancers III: Deth Lives (actual spelling)
Amityville 3-D
The Toxic Avenger III: The Last Temptation of Toxie
Smokey and the Bandit Part 3
Police Academy 3: Back in Training
(still comfortably within the Guttenberg years)
The Prophecy 3: The Ascent
Aces: Iron Eagle III



The Godfather Part III

Sean Gill said...

Mike,
Oh yeah, big fan of PHANTASM III (well every PHANTASM, too). I've been threatening for years to review the whole series; I should probably get around to doing that!

J.D.,
Oh, yeahhh! NINJA III is sort of the apex of Cannon's wonderful brand of nonsense! (also, DEATH WISH 3.)

Cannon,
Wow, now that is comprehensive list of suggestions! I wouldn't be surprised if a few of these crop up...