Only now does it occur to me... CLEOPATRA JONES (1973)

Only now does it occur to me.... that Shelley Winters' name––writ in the 'CLEOPATRA JONES font' and projected against a Tatooine-esque Turkish landscape––might have inspired the iconic STAR WARS main title.

This was 1973, a full two years before STAR WARS went into production, and while font designer Suzy Rice has explained her influences, isn't it possible that some subliminal memory of seeing Shelley Winters' name so stylishly depicted could have played a small role in one of the most recognizable movie fonts ever made? I'm gonna go ahead and say yes, because it makes me happy.

A few quick thoughts on CLEOPATRA JONES and why it's worth your time: Tamara Dobson (CHAINED HEAT, NORMAN... IS THAT YOU?) is Cleopatra Jones, a fabulous, kung fu-savvy, dirtbike enthusiast, stunt-driver, crack shot DEA Agent who is introduced to us while overseeing an air strike on poppy fields in Turkey.


 It's a special breed of film that begins with exploding flowers.

Later, we learn she has a ridiculous customized Corvette Stingray (see also: Mark Hamill's in CORVETTE SUMMER) with low-key U.S. Government vanity plates

and a specially-built hydraulic roof that automatically lifts up when she opens her door so that her afro remains unmussed.

Her boyfriend is the sensitive community organizer Bernie Casey (THE RUNNING MAN, THE MAN WHO FELL TO EARTH),

pictured here, as he should be, in an amazing glamour headshot that happens to be decorating Cleo's wicked bachelorette pad/lounge.

Her nemesis is Shelley Winters as the drug kingpin, "Mommy" (to whom the aforementioned Turkish poppy fields belonged), a raging, racist, lesbian who wears a different wig in every scene and delivers a high-hag horror-worthy performance, chewing not merely the scenery, but entire tableaux, co-stars and all.

And yes, on the far right, that is perennial 1970s/Charles Bronson-baddie, Paul Koslo,

whose own, humble, scenery-chewing skills cannot compete with the mistress.

Elsewhere, we have Cleopatra Jones laying down some JCVD-style, high-kicking smack 

on Bruce Glover-lookalike and DELIVERANCE rapist Bill McKinney...

...we have one of the finest comebacks in film history from character actor legend Antonio Fargas (FOXY BROWN, SHAFT) who, when asked if he is willing to cross Shelley Winters' "Mommy" responds:




...and finally, I must tip my hat to a film that not only has the balls to make Shelley Winters its lead villain in a performance that might prompt even Divine to advise "maybe you should tone it down a notch," but also is bold enough to end with a show-stopping kung fu battle/fistfight between Shelley and Tamara Dobson.

Amen.

Only now does it occur to me... IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS (1994)

Only now does it occur to me... that John Carpenter's IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS (1994) is such a wealth of creatively horrific visuals and ideas that one of its throwaway scares (not even really a scare, per se, moreso a morbid detail) became, in 2017, the entire basis of the marketing campaign for a $125 million Hollywood blockbuster.

I'm speaking here of THE MUMMY reboot (starring Tom Cruise), a film I must admit I have very little interest in seeing. However, I couldn't help but notice that the creepy "double-iris" of their Mummy has become quite ubiquitous:

Upon seeing this poster on the subway, I immediately thought of IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS––particularly the scene where a mad axeman looms behind Sam Neill and Bernie Casey outside a Manhattan diner.


Toward the scene's conclusion, while the axeman is menacing a frightened Sam Neill, we get a closer look at his eyes, which contain the double-iris effect:

What's funny is that this scene is so tightly constructed and confident in its "horror in broad daylight" premise that the whole "double-iris" aspect is probably only the fourth or fifth scariest detail of the entire tableau.

I reviewed IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS at length seven years ago (seven years?!), and for those who haven't seen it, the entirety of IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS is similarly layered––it has a sort of "throw in every scary thing you can think of and the kitchen sink" sensibility, but it really thrives on it. It's a mosaic of nightmare and lunacy that is incredibly focused; every element is carefully curated to fit the bigger picture, both thematically and visually. The double-iris is such a small detail that it's possible many people who have seen the film may have forgotten about it by the time the credits rolled. And yet, that's the power of Carpenter's films––from the spider-leg head in THE FACULTY (referencing THE THING), to CHILD'S PLAY 3's "Colonel Cochrane" (referencing HALLOWEEN III: SEASON OF THE WITCH) to DAZED AND CONFUSED paraphrasing the best line ("I've come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass...") from THEY LIVE, etc., etc., apparently Carpenter minutiae have been enthralling Hollywood for decades.

Note: it's also possible that THE MUMMY designers were inspired by DOUBLE VISION (2002), or something else entirely of which I'm unaware, but I'm going to go ahead and continue assuming that John Carpenter is the center of the universe.

Film Review: THE GLASS SHIELD (1994, Charles Burnett)

Stars: 3.8 of 5.
Running Time: 109 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Michael Boatman (CELEBRITY MOLE HAWAII, HAMBURGER HILL), Lori Petty (POINT BREAK, TANK GIRL), Ice Cube (GHOSTS OF MARS, THREE KINGS), Bernie Casey (IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS, SHARKY'S MACHINE), Richard Anderson (THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN, FORBIDDEN PLANET), Michael Ironside (TOTAL RECALL, EXTREME PREJUDICE), M. Emmett Walsh (BLOOD SIMPLE, STRAIGHT TIME), Erich Anderson (FRIDAY THE 13TH PART IV, MISSING IN ACTION), Wanda de Jesus (BLOOD WORK, THE INSIDER), Don Harvey (CREEPSHOW 2, DIE HARD 2), Tommy Redmond Hicks (SHE'S GOTTA HAVE IT, JOE'S BED-STUY BARBERSHOP). Cinematography by Elliot Davis (SHAKES THE CLOWN, OUT OF SIGHT).
Tag-line: "In a world filled with violence... his only weapon is the truth!"
Best one-liner: "Puttin' in a little overtime, Fields?" (malevolently uttered by Michael Ironside)

Charles Burnett is one of America's greatest, most underrated independent filmmakers. His film KILLER OF SHEEP has recently undergone a critical rediscovery, and his masterpiece, TO SLEEP WITH ANGER, is a work of great power and possibly the finest entry in the "houseguest from hell" subgenre. Seriously, I can't recommend TO SLEEP WITH ANGER enough– it weaves FAUST, Southern folklore, realistic family dynamics, and Danny Glover's finest, most devilish performance into a corn-whisky-stained tapestry of down-home tension (with frequent humor!). Not available on DVD, I was able to finally see TO SLEEP WITH ANGER at the Museum of Modern Art's (in NYC) retrospective of Burnett's work. So rent the VHS, because it's worth it.

Anyway, that leads me to my next point. After ANGER failed to achieve the financial success that it deserved, Burnett decided to try something a little more commercial. Enter THE GLASS SHIELD. A muck-raking, Southern Cali true-crime tract in the mode that would define such later films as L.A. CONFIDENTIAL, TRAINING DAY, and DARK BLUE, THE GLASS SHIELD tells the tale of a black rookie cop who discovers terrifying levels of corruption in the Sheriff's office where he's been assigned. Marketed as an Ice Cube vehicle (which it's really not), it's a crime drama packed with talented character actors... including Michael Ironside. And so, a fan of Burnett's, I swung by the Museum of Modern Art once more- to see a Michael Ironside movie at the MOMA. It was truly a momentous occasion, and I don't foresee it happening again, at least until MOMA does a HIGHLANDER retrospective (fingers crossed).

On the whole, THE GLASS SHIELD isn't quite as hard-hitting as it wants to be, but it's still quite an enjoyable film. We've got Michael Boatman as the bright-eyed, bushy-tailed recent academy graduate who's about to enter a racially-charged quagmire of dirty cops and dirtier D.A.'s where no one can emerge unsullied.


As the corrupt buddy-detectives, we have M. Emmet Walsh

and Michael Ironside.

Seeing these two giants of character acting playing evil buddies truly warmed my heart. Walsh is a terminally ill good-ole boy wanting to provide for his family. He plays it with that standard 'goobery Walsh élan' which the man is well-known for. Ironside fans will find a lot to like as well: we see him holdin' a baby, making a ship in a bottle, saying "about" in such a manner that betrays his Canadian origins, and headlining his own bowling team called the 'Rough Riders.'

MICHAEL IRONSIDE IS KEEPING AN EYE ON YOU

As a team, Walsh and Ironside make a pretty fantastic, villainous peanut gallery, and, as a mind-blowing coup de grâce of things one should never see, Michael Ironside and M. Emmett Walsh share a make-out session. Well, actually, that's something of a lie: Michael Ironside performs CPR on M. Emmett Walsh, but you have to admit it sounds a little more newsworthy when I phrase it the other way. Anyways...

Then we got that staple of the early 90's: Lori Petty playing Lori Petty... that is to say a misfit, no-nonsense, spunky l'il lady with a short haircut.

I have to mention that she and Michael Ironside also co-starred in 1993's FREE WILLY, and he chose her to star in the only movie he's ever directed, 1999's THE ARRANGEMENT. They had to have been buddies. I like to imagine Lori Petty in a redneck bar, perhaps uttering something smart-assed and offensive, drawing the ire of like a dozen lead-pipe-wrench-slinging guys in Confederate flag bandanas. They circle her and chuckle, nefariously. Then Ironside shows up and starts beating the hell out of them as Lori Petty gulps purloined Black Label, straight from the tap. If somebody wants to turn this into a buddy movie, I will gladly pay to see it.

Then there's Ice Cube as a fall guy. Mr. Cube brings some genuine pathos to the role- as films like THREE KINGS and even GHOSTS OF MARS have indicated, he's got some acting chops and an innate likability even when he's playing sort of unlikable characters.

On the right there is Don Harvey as a redunkulously racist, simple-minded cop. You may remember him as the Kevin Bacon-meets-Peter Weller villainous sidekick from "Ol' Chief Woodenhead" in CREEPSHOW 2.

Then there's some nice, featured-supporting turns for Elliott Gould (as a crime victim...or is he?), Bernie Casey (as a severe defense attorney), Sy Richardson (as Ice Cube's father-in-law), Tommy Redmond Hicks (as a crusading preacher), and Richard Anderson (as the corrupt police chief). The cinematography by Elliot Davis is moody, shadowy, and possessing a deep, rich color palette. Also of note is Stephen James Taylor's minimalist score, full of ominous tones and disquieting screeches.

There are some scenes that ring rather false, and there's use of that old standby corrupt cop movie cliché "Dont...trust...anybody," but on the whole, it's entertainment + muck-raking in a tight, well-constructed package. I have no problem giving it nearly four stars.

-Sean Gill

Film Review: IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS (1994, John Carpenter)

Stars: 5 of 5.
Running Time: 95 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Sam Neill (THE PIANO, JURASSIC PARK), Julie Carmen (THE MILAGRO BEANFIELD WAR, Tarantino's epiosde of ER), Frances Bay (BLUE VELVET, TWIN PEAKS: FIRE WALK WITH ME), John Glover (52 PICK-UP, THE EVIL THAT MEN DO), Jürgen Prochnow (DAS BOOT, BODY OF EVIDENCE), Bernie Casey (REVENGE OF THE NERDS, SHARKY'S MACHINE), Peter Jason (PRINCE OF DARKNESS, THEY LIVE), Charlton Heston, David Warner (MY BEST FRIEND IS A VAMPIRE, TRON).
Tag-line: "Lived Any Good Books Lately?"
Best one-liner: "You're my mommy. Know what today is? Today is Mommy's Day!"

"What about the people who don't read?" –"There's a movie." IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS is the last great horror movie of the 1980's (yes, I’m aware it was made in 1994). It's the sort of film that deserves a rightful place in the critical canon, yet was perhaps too intricate, too esoteric, or too labyrinthine for mass consumption. The visuals are sharp, glossy, and atmospheric, whether depicting an unearthly New England town on the cusp of autumn:

or a foreboding, black Byzantine church rising from the earth like a Stygian fist.

H.P. Lovecraft and his Cthulhu mythos are a point of departure (and the source of many a reference), but the film bursts with tropes from film noir (an insurance investigator, interrogational storytelling, and plenty of smoking), Philip K. Dick (mindfucks and illusions within delusions abound- "Reality isn't what it used to be"), and Stephen King (maybe it took a film with no concrete relation to any King story to perfectly nail the man's vibe!).

Most of the film's success rests upon Sam Neill's capable shoulders, and he remains entirely connected to the role whether he’s a debonair contrarian or a deranged head case.


AWWW, SHIIIIIT

We're afforded bold glimpses of the monsters Lovecraft deemed "indescribable," and Neill captures the ineffable dread of one's mind recoiling in terror at the sight of said monsters.


Jürgen "Did I ever tell you my favorite color was blue?" Prochnow IS Sutter Cane- bringing the ideal balance to a character who is equal parts bestsellin' hack and Judas to the human race.


The supporting roles are quite vivid, as well: an incomparable, twitchy John Glover:

Talk about the lunatics running the asylum! One of the greats.

a stately, grim David Warner:

David Warner- always a class act.

a likable, bewildered Bernie Casey; a gruffly fraudulent Peter Jason; and a charmingly off-kilter Frances Bay.

Frances Bay- she's the terrifying Grandma you always secretly wished you had.

This film takes us deep into the abyss- an endless, repeating chain of psychosis and decay- and forces us to look again and again, as if we were a playing card trapped in a bicycle wheel or a blade fused to a creaky, rusty windmill.

And the end- if we can call it that- strikes the perfect note of senseless absurdity. We’re left with no alternative other than to sit in the darkness, cackling at our own foolishness.

PFFFFFT!

Five stars.

-Sean Gill

Film Review: RENT-A-COP (1987, Jerry London)

Stars: 3 of 5.
Running Time: 96 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Burt Reynolds, Liza Minnelli, John P. Ryan (RUNAWAY TRAIN, CLASS OF 1999), James Remar (48 HRS., DEXTER, THE LONG RIDERS, THE COTTON CLUB), Bernie Casey (SHARKY'S MACHINE, IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS), Richard Masur (MR. BOOGEDY, LICENSE TO DRIVE), Dionne Warwick. Music by Jerry Goldsmith. Written by Dennis Shryack (HERO AND THE TERROR).
Tag-line: "Deadlier than Dirty Harry, faster than Cobra..." Why do we have to bring COBRA into this?
Best one-liner: "Merry Christmas!"

RENT-A-COP is so by-the-numbers, it's as if an Apple II-E were programmed to construct an '80s cop movie. It's chock full of maverick cops, snarky hookers, butterfingered rookies, stick-up-the-ass supervisors, merciless killers, evil dudes in mansions, and the buddy who you think is a buddy until you realize he's working for the bad guy. The cast is bursting at the seams with familiar faces: John P. Ryan (Dad in IT'S ALIVE),

John P. Ryan calls Burt Reynolds a loose cannon.

Richard Masur (Dad in LICENSE TO DRIVE and MR. BOOGEDY), Bernie Casey (U.N. Jefferson in REVENGE OF THE NERDS), and a very special appearance by Dionne Warwick...as a pimp! The music by Jerry Goldsmith is laughably epic, sweeping, and full of orchestral emotion: but this ain't GONE WITH THE WIND.

Burt prepares to deliver the one-liner, "Merry Christmas."

At several points, actors (including Burt) look straight into the camera (by accident?). Burt plays Burt; wearing macabre sweaters and butchering his banter (probably cause Dom's not around to slap). It's like a watered down SHARKY'S MACHINE.

Liza plays Liza, and clearly directed and costumed herself.

I guarantee you that the words "fabulous" and "honey" did not appear this much in the original script. Same goes for all the Liza freestyle dancing. At one point she is expected to seriously deliver the line "I jumped on top of him and I DID WHAT I DO!"

"I DID WHAT I DO!"

James Remar (Ajax in THE WARRIORS, Harry Morgan on DEXTER) is kinda doing an 'evil Swayze' routine. We see his stone cold killer doin' his thing for half the movie, and then WHAM––out of nowhere he's doing a half-naked super-sweaty solo dance number! His character name is then revealed to be 'Dancer.' Even for an 80's movie, this is insane.

If you're a Remar fan, you may have to watch this video twelve thousand times.

Now for the kicker: Liza hunts for the killer in a dance club. A guy passes by and––SCHWINK––gooses her. Liza yells into her wire, "Jesus, I just got goosed by some guy dressed as Little Red Riding Hood?!" We cut to Burt on the other end of the line, smiling in secret satisfaction.

And there ya have it- incontrovertible evidence that Burt loves goosing. (See also: my review of STROKER ACE.) Three stars, I guess.

Film Review: SHARKY'S MACHINE (1981, Burt Reynolds)

Stars: 4 of 5.
Running Time: 122 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Vittorio Gassman, Brian Keith, Bernie Casey, Henry Silva, Charles Durning, Earl Holliman, Darryl Hickman, Richard Libertini.
Tag-line: "Nobody leans on Sharky's Machine."
Best one-liner(s): "I'm gonna pull the chain on you, pal. And you wanna know why? 'Cause you're fucking up my city. 'Cause you're walking all over people like you own them. And you wanna know the worst part? You're from out of state."

"Nobody better lean on Sharky's machine." Well, I got some bad news for ya, tagline. This movie is all about leaning on Sharky's machine. It's about tryin' to break that machine. His machine, of course, being the elite unit of men that Sharky builds during his exile in vice. Reynolds IS Sharky. And Reynolds IS also the auteur of this fine picture. And his machine includes everybody from the voice of Piglet to Bill and Ted's disapproving teacher. Now there's one question that's definitely gonna pop up if you watch SHARKY'S MACHINE. And it's gonna be: does director Burt Reynolds simply not know the rules of cinema, or is he openly choosing to flout them? And the answer is pretty clear if you know Sharky from Shinola.

For example- Reynolds has THREE extremely different pop songs play over the opening credits in a medley (including "Street Life"), he uses more helicopter shots than I thought humanly possible, he directs Charles Durning to be REALLY pissed off for every frame of his performance, and he condenses about a half-hour of screentime involving key plot points, forensics, and the first meeting between Sharky and the main villain into a montage sequence accompanied by some real smoove jazz. Reynolds cries! Reynolds makes key baddie Vittorio Gassman look like a shadowy doppelganger of SHARKY, 'stache and all! Reynolds slaps around both women AND corpses! Reynolds makes a movie in the vein of THE FRENCH CONNECTION in 1981! Reynolds inserts NINJAS into the narrative of a serious crime drama! So make no mistake, this movie is something of an anomaly. It's not afraid to buck convention. And it's a damn fine film. So nobody better lean on SHARKY'S MACHINE. Except maybe Loni, and maybe Dom on the weekends and when Burt's in a good mood.

-Sean Gill